Jael - Forever In Our Hearts

I find this blog very hard to write but feel that I must (so if it is a bit sporadic - you will understand). September 1st will be the two year anniversary of our beautiful baby's death. Sometimes her death seems so surreal that I wonder if it really happened, and other times the sadness and reality feel so strong that I cannot breathe.

After Jael's death it seems like I could not escape being around babies. I started working for someone who had a baby girl born one day before Jael, great friends of ours gave birth to a beautiful baby boy a month later, and I began plans to improve our church's nursery. A year later I find myself working with Shane in a young adult - young couples ministry where babies are everywhere and I do mean everywhere. And to top it off, I have started a MOPS group (Mothers of Preschoolers).

I don't always understand what God is doing, but I do know that He has given me so much grace and mercy during these past two years; I cannot even begin to describe it to you. I have to admit that I have difficulty with the saying "God is good." My view of goodness does not look like his view goodness (if that was the case Jael would have lived), and my plans are not always his plans. But one thing I do know is that He loves me and loves Jael. Our MOPS theme verse is so appropriate "...how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ..." EPH 3:18. His love has been with me and my family every step of the journey.

On September 1st, I would like to invite you to release a balloon in Jael's memory. Our family has started this tradition on her birthday and it has meant a lot to us.

First You Pick the Berries...

We decided to go blackberry picking in the field across the street.
The kids and I just grabbed some buckets and started picking. No sooner did I say to the kids that it is probably not a good idea to be doing this in shorts and flip flops that C started screaming. His first bee sting was not only one but two in between his toes. We had drama for the rest of the day, but the kids wanted to go back over. Shane left for a meeting so we decided to surprise him with a blackberry pie. The kids came downstairs fully covered (boots and gloves) and they were ready for the picking. I on the other hand had on capris and the kids told me that I should change but I did not. Things were going well until we went back to the same bush that C got stung (definitely was not thinking). I was stung three times in the leg and even our dog, Eli, was stung on his nose (it swelled). Well, that was it for me. M tried to make a baking soda salve and C came at me with nail clippers to try to find the stinger. It was quite comical. Despite adversity we picked enough blackberries for a pie and it came out quite successful and Dad was surprised. What a memory!

Too Hot!

You never know how much you appreciate something until it is gone. Well, central air is at the top of my list. The weather has been very hot here but not humid (not like TN hot though). Outside it is not too bad but inside the house is very hot. Central air is not common here and people just "suffer." They say that it is only a few weeks out of the year that it is unbearable so why bother with air. I say - WHY NOT! Thankfully we have the beautiful rivers, oceans and lakes to enjoy. Shane has been coming home from work and we pack up and go to the river to cool off before a late dinner (too hot to cook early). This weekend we spent the day at the Chemanis River with our pastor and his family and Sunday afternoon we went to the ocean with a huge group of young couples from our church. We stayed until the sun started to go down both times praying that the house would cool off. I really can't complain. We are so thankful for the friends that we have made and the beautiful places that we go to everyday. We are having so much fun. School starts September 5th for us, so we are taking advantage of the last days of summer.

The Sun Will Come Out Tomorrow

"The sun will come out tomorrow" became the theme of the week for us during Nanny and G-daddy's visit. Despite the not so great weather - there were sites to be seen. We did go kayaking which is always fun. Nanny chose to take pictures and not brave the ocean. We also took them to Shane's favorite spot which is the Chemanis River. It is a beautiful site but one that really needs to be seen on a very hot day. The water comes from the mountains and the water is extremely cold. Jerry really tried to get in but it was even too cold for M and C - and that is definitely saying a lot. Shane and I were really disappointed in the weather and we never really got to just go somewhere and spend the day soaking in the rays, but as Jerry said everything that we wanted to do the weather (rain) held. We still had a great week just being with family and sharing such wonderful memories. As we said a tearful goodbye and sent them back to a very hot TN - the sun came out! The week following their visit became one of the hottest weeks of the year - GO FIGURE!

Our Trip to Tofino

I will have to highlight this trip and let the pictures do the talking. Mary and Jerry wanted to take a mini vacation while visiting Canada and everyone said that Tofino was the place to see. Tofino is on the west coast so the beaches looked very different from what we were use to. They were absolutely beautiful but the water was extremely cold. The kids braved it for a little while but it is more of a place to walk and enjoy the scenery (unless you are a surfer with wet suits).

There were three highlights of our trip - one is that we saw bears on the side of the road. I saw it first and yelled bear, so Shane pulled over and got out with the camera. There was a moma bear and her cubs. The cubs were growling at Shane. I wanted to feed them but the kids would not let me out of the car. They were afraid that I was going to get attacked.

Our next highlight was a two hour whale watching tour. It was so much fun. We did get to see whales but not the killer whales that we were hoping for. When the boat was moving all was fine but then we stopped for a really long time to watch a bunch of whales. The guide kept saying "Don't look in the boat; look at the land and breathe if you feel sick." The more he said that the worse I felt. None of us got sick but started to get green and were ready for the guide to get the boat moving again. We were able to see sea lions, sea otters, eagles, puffer birds (apparently very unique and they float around on the water quite a bit) and whales.

Our third highlight was that we found a wonderful restaurant overlooking the ocean and had a great dinner watching the sun set and the waves hitting the rocks. Mary and Jerry called it our anniversary dinner (14th - holy cow!).

Even though the weather was not the best and it was definitely colder than what we were use to, we had a great time and had a hot tub to come back to at night to get all warm again.